Our Bond
by SugarBoots101
Summary: Love is alive, oppressive and, completely domineering.


She clasps her hands together and looks semi-fearlessly into my eyes. She spent a moment rambling about her heart and how it ties her to her friends after I had asked her if she was afraid. Aizen-sama has come to me and told me bluntly that Orihime's reserving powers were of no use to us anymore. He told me to get rid of her. I told her the truth to thrive on her feeling of complete terror. And yet, she stood in front of me explaining to me why she wasn't afraid.

She's afraid. I can feel it radiate from her. It creates this smell that is familiar to me and unknown to her. She's trying to convince herself that I will not take her pretty face and smash it in…or that I'd put a hole right through her chest. Even through her incoherent babble about her heart, her voice trembles as well as her hands. She's covering her body in cold sweat. However, she stands her ground with her feet apart telling me she's not afraid. I've been alive for decades and I know fear when I see it. What made her minuscule mind think she can hide how she really feels from me?

I did not move. I look at her and watch her continue to explain her reasoning. Her logic is flawed, fallible, and yet, passionate. Her grey eyes glisten with a profound hope I've been trying to diminish the moment I saw it. She wouldn't break under my voice of logic. She didn't crumble to my brutal honesty. She'd clasped her hands over her chest and believe mindlessly. She stared at the moon a lot—a moon that remained in its crescent form in the middle of the grey sky. She stared at it as if it would magically turn into a sun and brighten up Hueco Mundo. Hueco Mundo is not earth. The sun doesn't rise nor does it fall. We don't have one. Her denial of everything infuriates me.

Her friends, they are weak. One after another their spiritual power fluctuates. However, over the progressing time, they started to decline. When she feels it, her mouth goes slack and her eyes widen but her feelings never waver. She believes they will rescue her. She believes they are strong enough.

"When you care about someone, it's as if you two have one heart," She smiles while she looks over her clasped hands in the center of her chest. "Even if empathy is impossible, I believe as long as there is love that we can survive through everything together. We all share one heart. They want to protect me and I would risk my life to protect them" She holds her hands tighter and raises her gaze to meet mine. Some of her fear faded. Her passion is embedded in her words and the more she speaks, the more she believes. But, I am not affected. This "heart" she keeps talking about is an organ that is only designed to pump the blood through her body. It helps her _live. _Why does she think she can give it to other people so carelessly and live? Is there a surgical procedure that connects all hearts into one? Isn't that genetically impossible?

I remember Aizen-sama told me that it is common for humans to use the word "heart" as a metaphor to the feeling "love". The "heart" is a powerful insignia for love. It is how humans communicate about their feelings in ways they can understand. They color the heart pink or red after drawing it in a way that makes it look attractive. I've seen a human heart. It is not attractive. If anything, it's repulsive. Humans are too delirious for me to comprehend their means.

"If I was to tear a hole in your chest, would I see it? What if I open your skull, will it be there?" I asked her. Her eyes widen but, they quickly recovered.

"My heart is in my chest," she exclaims. "It's here," She takes her tiny fist and places it over her left breast. "It beats. It reminds me I am alive and that there are people who love me". I watch her gestures as she helplessly explains her feeble concept of a heart. She silent for a moment and lets her hand fall to her side. She bravely walks towards me and adverts my eyes. Her delicate hand rises and she touches the left side of my chest. "Your heart is here," she whispers.

"There is nothing there," I say. She shakes her head no.

"I feel a heartbeat. You have one," With her other hand, she takes my hand and places it over my chest. She's foolish. "To you, it may be to only keep you alive. To us, it means a lot more than that. We value it. It's what makes us one," I push her away and lash out at her.

"The human heart keeps you alive! It is designed to help you move and breathe! It is one of your primary organs and one you cannot live without! Stop with your babble of hearts being one. It's pathetic and insignificant!" I stopped when I realize I was out of breath. I wiped my mouth and could not remember the last time I've lost composure. Her innocence and hope annoyed me gravely. I just want to strangle her to death.

I glimpse her way and she's smiling. She's beautiful when she smiles. "Are you mocking me?" I asked.

"No, no!" She says quickly after waving her hands vigorously. "I'm just surprised to see you upset. I didn't think it could happen".

"You're bleak mind is upsetting." I said. "It makes me want to kill you faster".

"You're bleak attitude upsets me and yet I tolerate it every moment of the day,"

"You are forced to, onna. You don't have the liberties that I have," I righted myself to look her square in the face. She didn't flinch but did the same.

"I'm not scared of you," She said.

"You don't have to be. Your fate doesn't change regardless. You are going to die by my hands. That's that."

"Before you weren't an Espada, what were you doing with yourself?"

"Excuse me?" I looked at her with a puzzled expression and hint of annoyance after she asked that. She took a deep breath and thought about how to reword what she said. Instead, she changed her approach entirely and tried an emotional one.

"You were being a hollow and taking people's souls. Didn't that sadden you?" Being a hollow and taking souls is how we hollows live our lives. As human thrive on meals for energy, we thrive on souls. There is nothing to be saddened about. It is just how we live our lives. I'm not sure why she'd insist that I was emotionally intact with myself and my means to survive?

"Sadden me? Why would it sadden me?"

"It's evident that you still have your emotions. It's evident that you still have your heart". I sighed heavily before meeting her gaze again. Her facial expression changed. She didn't seem scared anymore but sadden. It was as if she was trying to expend herself to me the way humans do to comfort one another. I believe she's forgotten I am not human and _still_ a hollow.

"I am the Fourth Esapada. I represent emptiness. What happened earlier was a fluke. You're stupidity riles me up in ways it shouldn't. It's a frustrating scenario."

"A fluke you say?" She announces. She didn't sound convinced with could've been my down fall. I should have reworded that properly to place the fear back into her body. But, she pushed with her questions as if she was trying convince me to see her light on the situation. "Didn't living a life without purpose sadden you? Didn't you feel lonely?" There is something deep inside of her that keeps her going—something small but in her brain that tells her to push my wits. She bravely listens and probes me with her grey eyes. When I decide to kill her, it will be her grey eyes I'm going to eliminate first. I'm tired of her staring at me.

In the distance, I feel a strong spiritual pressure coming this way rapidly. I looked at Orihime who has clasped her hands over her chest again. "If he dies, it's because of you." I said.

"I know," She says meekly.

"Can your 'heart' live with that?"

"Can yours?" I inched forward and grabbed her hair. Kurosaki Ichigo came bursting out from the floor.

"Let her GO!" Is the first thing he screams. I look at the fierceness of his coffee brown eyes but they do not match Orihime's. She seems braver and yet, she's far weaker. I obey his command and watch her stumble to the ground. "Inoue," He calls softly. She smiles to it and rises slowly.

"Kurosaki-kun," she calls just as softly.

"Are you alright?" He asks without looking at her—focusing his attention on me.

"Yes" She says quickly. I see their bond. It's visible, alive. I look at her and her bullies interfere. I step forward and decide to fight Ichigo. I'll deal with her later

* * *

><p>I saw fragments of the sun break through the sky. It fell and crash landed behind her. Her orange mane blew to the gentle breeze the pieces left but she never took her eyes off of me. Her brows furrowed. I would've never anticipated this day to come.<p>

Kurosaki Ichigo stands up and pats Orihime's arms. She looks at him briefly but moves her eyes to me. Their bond never ceases to amaze me. Their gestures and stares told me there was more than just friendship between them. It was that feeling of love she mentioned earlier. I understand it now.

"It looks like it hurts…" She trailed off. My face had grown accustomed to showing what I was really feeling inside. I felt the throbbing sensation on my limbs. My heart is there. My heart is alive.

I didn't say anything as she inched forward. If I was the same person I was hours prior, I would have felt ashamed and embarrassed to have been defeated by a mere mortal. I would have also been ashamed and embarrassed to see this woman reach for me as if she could save my damned soul. The irony of the situation brings a small smile to my lips. Perhaps everything is not as clear cut as logic after all.

I didn't believe humans were strong. I never believed they were capable of destructive forces that immobilize Espadas. However, I was living proof of the power that thrives in the human soul. Despite Kurosaki Ichigo having fractions of hollow abilities, his strength and transformations are magnificent. Now I see why Aizen-sama wanted him alive so desperately. It isn't the boy he loves but what he is capable of.

And there goes that word again…love.

It's a strong sensation that thrives in the veins of anyone wielding this emotion. It's alive, oppressive, and completely domineering. It is the most cohesive emotion to have that interrupts the flow of coherent logic and rational. It is a child working inside of you and teaches you how to be possessive, ignorant, and selfish. And yet, humans adore this feeling so much.

Orihime clasped her small hands around my face and tears welded in her eyes. It was the same tears that fell when she begged for Kurosaki Ichigo to come back to life. She rocked on her knees and begged desperately for him to save her. After I created a hole in his chest, he managed to resurface from his vast abyss and transform right before my eyes. With swift attacks, he crippled me and nearly killed me. It was all because she begged for his return…

"I'm sorry" She squeezes out in between sobs. Her tears gave me an uncomfortable tightness in my chest. Her grey eyes glistened under the incoming sunlight and melted away her rough edges. She appeared completely beautiful—almost angelic. Despite her strength, she appeared weak, fragile, in this very moment. I just had an urge to cradle her in my arms.

I'm not sure what I feel for her but I know it's strong. It flows in my body like blood. I brushed her tears away with my thumbs and listen to her sob softly. "Re-remember when you said that hearts are _just_ organs? Do you believe that now?" I didn't know how to answer that. So, I didn't. She seemed contempt with my silence and recovered from her brief moment of tears. "I remember when I asked you if killing Kurosaki-kun would hurt you" She looked at me, "Would it?" I was getting ready to say yes but why was I saying yes? Why would his death hurt me? She probed me with her grey eyes and hoped I'd see her light. She knew something. When she touched over my lips, I suddenly understood. It all seemed so foolishly comprehensive and I feel naïve for not bothering to understand before. It's her concept of hearts and her theory of love that has confused me throughout the battle with Kurosaki Ichigo. I was trying to understand what it meant to have a heart and be emotional…and now…I understand.

Prior this battle, I've spent countless hours with Orihime and hear her talk about her confidence in her friends. She explained her feelings, revealed things to me that I never bothered to read between the lines to. I just accepted her once worthless words and trampled on her hope to hurt her. All along, before I even cared to acknowledge it, she noticed our bond. It was not as strong and as secure as her bonds with her friends but, it was a bond nonetheless. We established our relationship which subconsciously forced us to feel_ something_ about each other. She is a woman intact with her emotions while I struggle to figure out mine. It makes sense to why I've never seen it before.

My hand fell to my side and she looked at the hole in my chest. "A long time ago, you loved someone." I looked at her grey eyes which focused on my hole. "You love someone with your heart and I hoped by talking to you and revealing my love for my friends would help you remember what it was like. I never lost hope."

I finally understand what that thing inside of her was. It was hope. That hope I wanted to destroy countless times for countless reasons. It was a small enigma I was aware of this whole time. Hope is a powerful emotion as well. It…it saved her life from my destructive path…

She placed her hand over my heart and I began to fade away. "Empathy is not a human delusion. And, perhaps, empathy truly reveals itself on the brink of death. But, we had a bond and we did care about one another. I hate that it takes all this to now to discover it." She frowned some and I closed my eyes. "I don't know where hollows go when they die but I hope you can establish a bond strong enough that will allow you to love." I opened my eyes and looked at her. I felt heat on my cheeks and an unusual sting in my eyes. Something slid down my left cheek after my vision blurred. I didn't have hands to catch it nor did Orihime bother to move to catch it herself. "And when you love, I hope you are happy. I hope you get your heart back". I closed my eyes and felt like I was floating in mid air before everything darkened.

Foolish Woman. I wish I could've told her thank you.


End file.
